A good feeling, indeed

Wow, what a difference a few weeks make. I haven't been eating as well as I should be, but now that I'm addressing my iron deficiency, things seem so much better. My energy is returning, which is resulting in my desire to exercise. I'm just going to go with that for now, and hope the food thing follows.


And, a huge feeling of accomplishment has swept over me all day today. Not only did I get through the craziest week ever, especially for being the summer, but I've also continued to send out packages and complete orders this week.


I sent out a very interesting package to a popular blogger (not perez, FYI) as a thank you for something, and who knows where that will go, but the feeling of sealing that package and sending it in the mail was so fulfilling.


Some of my marketing pays off, and some of it goes nowhere, but just the fact that I'm doing it is a win win in itself. To sit back and do nothing would be worse than putting my product out there and getting turned down.


I'm still waiting feedback from one huge vendor. I've been turned down by them twice now, but so far, I haven't taken no for an answer. When we make improvements, or when they get a new manager, I just send some more product. Someday we'll have the right combination and they'll say "Yes"...but if not, I'll keep plugging away.


A few weeks ago, in the deep crevice of my misery, I would have done all of this (the vera basket, the huge hallmark order, the new marketing shipments) and felt nothing. I would have thought "Who cares, it's all going to end someday." But thankfully, with a better outlook and a clearer head, I can see all of this for what it is.


It's a feeling of accomplishment. A feeling that I'm making a mark on the world. A feeling that I can be proud of myself. A feeling that my two boys can be proud of their mom someday for standing up for something she believes in and working hard to give them a legacy.

The knowing that I haven't quit this business and that I've created something unique from nothing but creativity and a little maniacal energy, is very fulfilling.

Some days are better than others, and some days just suck the life out of me, but I wouldn't keep doing this if it wasn't part of my soul. I chug through the hard work on days when I'd rather be six feet under, and relish in the minor accomplishment of finding a great basket on days when I feel like I'm on cloud nine.

My ups and downs may not be typical of an entrepreneur, but it's my path, and I'm carving it bit by bit...even if it is with a spork.